oh! myspace.

One of my favorite things about myspace is reconnecting with people with whom I had nothing in common at the age of 7 and even less in common now. I mean that. I always kind of wonder what I'm supposed to say when some perfectly lovely person I barely knew when I was 13 writes me some long, sweet letter about how they found me and couldn't believe they knew someone who lived in New York, and why don't I have any pictures of my kids up? and it's so neat I stayed in school after 10th grade, when they dropped out to start a family. The point is, I like that myspace lets me chat with people who might as well live in an alternate universe from me, it's like finally getting to see what happened in the chapters of "Choose Your Own Adventure" that I DIDN'T pick (but I have lovingly visualized for you in picture-form - that's me with my 2 boys, Jaydrew and Krevota!). Don't think I'm knocking my roots - it's not that I think being raised by a fancy doctor from the east coast who gave me all the opportunities in the world is "better" than if my teenaged biological mother has raised me on her parents' ranch in rural Nebraska with no hope of escape, it's just that I can't imagine that world. Long, boring explanation aside, my favorite part about meeting different people from my past on myspace is that they're an endless font of cheesy surveys that I can complete sarcastically. I've completed one for you, because I looooooove you...

From: knife fight
Date: 04 Jun 2007, 05:37 PM

Looovvve Survey
You must answer every question TRUTHFULLY!
(or a flock of 13 year old girls will stab you in the face tonight, with those colorful pens the kids these days like. i added that part myself, but it's probably true. thanks! -gail)

[01] Do you still have feelings for your ex
i guess that means "extra arm" and no, because i don't have an extra arm.

[02] Have you ever been given roses?
sure. have you ever been given ebola? answer: no.

[03] What is your all-time favorite romance movie?
cemetary man. awwwwwwww!!!!!

[04] How many times have you honestly been in love?
1 if you don't count ramune. god! that stuff is awesome.

[05] Do you believe that everyone has a soul-mate?
that's a lame question. i'm changing it to: do they still sell soul-glo? answer: TBD

[06] Where'd he go?
he.... man? he-man was fictional. i'ma say "to castle greyskull."

[07] Have you ever had your heart broken?
this survey is soppy. i'm going to change this one to: have you ever had your kneecaps broken? answer: my radiologist seems to think i fractured my right kneecap like 15 years ago but whatever.

[8] Your thoughts on online or long distance relationship
was that a question? let's make this one: the mothership? answer: tuesday

[9] Have you ever seen a friend as more than a friend?
do you mean "as a werewolf"? because no, no matter what that girl kjersten in 1st grade said, she WAS NOT.

[10] Do you believe the statement, "Once a cheater always a cheater"
this is totally why i don't play monopoly with my man's family. little boy, you have a problem that "covertly" stuffing little pink $500 bills under your shoe can't fix.

[11] How many kids do you want to have?
i like baby goats, but not in a "oooh, let's get one" way.

[12] What is your favorite color(s)
this question offends me on like 6 different levels

[13] What are your views on gay marriage?
duh, everyone knows that only straight white ugly people waving giant signs purporting to knows what "god hates" are allowed to openly and legally declare their love and property rights. DUH.

[14] Do you believe you truly only love once?
i thought i would never love again when they stopped making "ok soda" - does anyone else remember "ok soda"? seriously the highlight of my entire 8th grade year.

[15] Imagine you're 79 & your spouse just died, would you re-marry?
imagine you're a walrus and someone took your bucket. suck on that one, survey.

[16] At what age did you start noticing the opposite sex?
one morning i grew "penisvision" and half the population became visible to me. i'ma say "birth."

[17] What songs do you want to hear at your wedding?
songs by/for/about the norse gods

[18] do you know some one that likes u?
lame. this one is going to be: "do you know someone who likes inuit throat singing?" answer: probably                                

Comments

[ambika]

This made my Friday. The photoshop is especially horrifying/lovely.

And I'm glad I'm not the only one to have this experience--that is, having someone I knew when I was *7* contact me via myspace to fill me in on their 3 kids & army husband and how great things are in Tacoma. WTF?!