from the department of retarded bridalwear photo shoots

So you're working at some ridiculous foofy bridal dress conglomerate, and you're thinking to yourself, "How can we best showcase our fine, overpriced, amorphous gowns? What makes OUR foofy bridal dress conglomerate DIFFERENT from all the others hawking giant wads of overpriced white taffeta?" And the answer comes to you as if Thor himself whispered it into your ear: AN OLDE-TIMEY BICYCLE. THE ANSWER IS CLEARLY AN OLDE-TIMEY BICYCLE. And not just ANY old-timey bicycle, a comically oversized one. And not just ANY model, a sour-faced one who looks like she doesn't know HOW she got on the aforementioned old-timey bicycle, but she's pretty sure she can't get down, and screw you for laughing about it.

BRILLIANT.